Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
Saturday, April 9, 2011
How does my neck look? 4/9/11
I thought I'd never see the day when my FT4 was within range, but today is the day! My blood draw was Tuesday afternoon. I've been sick since Thursday, so I haven't been checking to see if my ENDO posted my levels online until now. So unless my labs got mixed up with someone else's who has ThyCa (because my TSH is lower than usual), my FT4 is 1.0 (range 0.7 - 1.5), but my TSH is <.01 (range for ThyCans 0.1 - 0.5). To celebrate, I thought I'd post a neck photo so you can tell me how the neck of someone who's FT4 is finally in range looks like!
In case you were wondering what my FT4 and TSH levels have been, since my surgeries and RAI last year, here's my blood draw history:
04/05/11 Free T4 1.0 ng/dl0.7-1.5 TSH <0.01 uIU/ml0.35-5.50
02/07/11 Free T4 1.7 ng/dl0.7-1.5 TSH 0.01 uIU/ml0.35-5.50
12/03/10 Free T4 1.8 ng/dl0.7-1.5 TSH 0.01 uIU/ml0.35-5.50
11/05/10 Free T4 1.9 ng/dl0.7-1.5 TSH <0.01 uIU/ml0.35-5.50
10/05/10 Free T4 1.6 ng/dl0.7-1.5 TSH 0.01 uIU/ml0.35-5.50
08/10/10 Free T4 1.63 ng/dl0.51-1.20 TSH 0.25 uIU/ml0.34-4.82
06/29/10 TSH 67.44 uIU/ml0.34-4.82 (Taken before RAI, to make sure it was over 30)
*NOTE: TSH for ThyCans has to be below 1.0, as the goal is to suppress the TSH so we are borderline hyperthyroid, making it hard for any thyroid cells, cancerous or not, to create Tg, which is the thyroid cancer tumor marker.
Thursday, April 7, 2011
Is the T3 working?
Is it? I'm sure this is a question my ENDO will be asking me at my appt next week. I don't think I have an answer to that. I just don't know. It seemed to be working when I started taking it mid-February. But skip forward a month, I'm in San Francisco to brainstorm with my 'clients' (really, they were my co-workers that have a stake in the database I am charged with creating) on my main project. I couldn't talk. A few times I caught myself pausing because I couldn't finish my thought or sentence, and I had to say, 'brain not working.' I haven't had to say that in a month, and there I was, in an important meeting and not able to formulate a sentence. Crap.
"Was it the meds, were they not working?" I have no idea. So, I started to review my daily routine - is it something I am doing that is making this happen again? My observations are as follows:
-I've been drinking a lot more coffee, daily. Not Peet's strength coffee, but coffee nonetheless.
-I've been getting a lot less sleep for about a month now. I think it is mostly work stress, but more recently it has been pet stress.
-I've had a few days where I felt like I was going to fall asleep driving home.
-For the first time today (actually, yesterday 4/6), I felt sleepy at work.
So, I am thinking and hoping that this is just from lack of sleep, not that the new med is not working.
I did have my 6wk blood draw yesterday, to see what my levels are with the lower T4 and the added T3 dosage change from February. Just in time for my ENDO appt next week. I'm trying to put together some questions for my ENDO. He always asks me what questions I have after he has gone over all of his stuff with me, but sometimes I'm still processing what he just told me, so I'm not even sure what to ask. One time my question didn't even make sense to me, and all I remember him saying was, "I think you are asking about....." LOL - must've been that thyroid brain fog. Once or twice I did go to my appt with questions in hand, but I think it would be nice to give him my questions ahead of time so he knows what my concerns are going into my appt. So far, I only have two questions for him:
1. Will the Genzyme Thyrogen shortage affect when my WBS is scheduled in June?
2. Was my ultrasound in December a 'careful neck ultrasound', where all levels are checked? If it wasn't, I want one.
"Was it the meds, were they not working?" I have no idea. So, I started to review my daily routine - is it something I am doing that is making this happen again? My observations are as follows:
-I've been drinking a lot more coffee, daily. Not Peet's strength coffee, but coffee nonetheless.
-I've been getting a lot less sleep for about a month now. I think it is mostly work stress, but more recently it has been pet stress.
-I've had a few days where I felt like I was going to fall asleep driving home.
-For the first time today (actually, yesterday 4/6), I felt sleepy at work.
So, I am thinking and hoping that this is just from lack of sleep, not that the new med is not working.
I did have my 6wk blood draw yesterday, to see what my levels are with the lower T4 and the added T3 dosage change from February. Just in time for my ENDO appt next week. I'm trying to put together some questions for my ENDO. He always asks me what questions I have after he has gone over all of his stuff with me, but sometimes I'm still processing what he just told me, so I'm not even sure what to ask. One time my question didn't even make sense to me, and all I remember him saying was, "I think you are asking about....." LOL - must've been that thyroid brain fog. Once or twice I did go to my appt with questions in hand, but I think it would be nice to give him my questions ahead of time so he knows what my concerns are going into my appt. So far, I only have two questions for him:
1. Will the Genzyme Thyrogen shortage affect when my WBS is scheduled in June?
2. Was my ultrasound in December a 'careful neck ultrasound', where all levels are checked? If it wasn't, I want one.
ThyCa group meeting - Apr 5, 2011
Another good meeting last night. Well, gee, how could any of our meetings be bad when we are amongst others in the same boat?!? As usual, there were a lot of questions from our two newest members. I had to add my two cents on something that was not really a question, but I felt it needed to be said. I was in her shoes not too long ago, so I know the feeling, and in that moment, when I was listening to her say, "but I'm thinking of applying for a job, but what if I have to go through another round of RAI or surgery?..." I was sitting right next to her so I looked her in the eye and said,
"I think you should do whatever you want to do. We can't let our cancer dictate our lives. I was there not too long ago (this is where I started to get choked up a bit). I was lucky to be able to take off four months from work. When I returned last September, my boss was already telling me what my goals and projects were for the rest of the year and this year, and all I could think to myself was 'but what if I have to get another round of RAI or a surgery?!?' I couldn't look past what I had just gone through. But you can't put your life on hold because you are afraid that you may have to go back for more treatment."
Just recently, I realized that I was at that place where I was able to look beyond my cancer. I was almost there during Christmas when during a heated argument with Viv, I had said, "After everything I had to go through this past year, I think I should be able to do anything I want to do, regardless of how reckless or irresponsible it is." At the time, I was half believing it, because I was still worried about the mystery tissue that was uncovered by my ultrasound earlier that month, that I was going to need surgery to remove it if it was thyroid tissue. Then at the start of this year, I had to layout my projects and goals for the year. I couldn't even give myself any due dates because all I could think of was 'but I might need surgery for my mystery tissue, then I have my 1-yr anniversary WBS in May and I'll have to go hypo....' I know, what kind of thinking was that? All I was focusing on was the what if this or what if that scenarios. Everyone around me is telling me to think positive, to not worry. That is so easy to say when you are not the one who is dealing with it. But when you are that person who is living it, it is a completely different story.
It wasn't until my appt with my 2nd opinion ENDO last month that I started to believe that things really are going to be Ok, that I don't have anything to worry about...that it is Ok to make future plans, but most importantly that it is Ok to live my life. Now, I'm not cancer free yet, and I'm not saying that I will never have anything to worry about again, because that would be foolish. But I was finally there, at the point where I wasn't worried about what was going to happen to me with my cancer.
I want to thank my family, friends, co-workers, pretty much everyone for allowing me to get to that point on my own terms. I'm sure there are some of us, cancer patient or not, that can get to that point fairly easily, but I am not one of those people. I am that person that needs to see it to believe it. But I believe it now. I am no longer letting my cancer dictate my life.
"I think you should do whatever you want to do. We can't let our cancer dictate our lives. I was there not too long ago (this is where I started to get choked up a bit). I was lucky to be able to take off four months from work. When I returned last September, my boss was already telling me what my goals and projects were for the rest of the year and this year, and all I could think to myself was 'but what if I have to get another round of RAI or a surgery?!?' I couldn't look past what I had just gone through. But you can't put your life on hold because you are afraid that you may have to go back for more treatment."
Just recently, I realized that I was at that place where I was able to look beyond my cancer. I was almost there during Christmas when during a heated argument with Viv, I had said, "After everything I had to go through this past year, I think I should be able to do anything I want to do, regardless of how reckless or irresponsible it is." At the time, I was half believing it, because I was still worried about the mystery tissue that was uncovered by my ultrasound earlier that month, that I was going to need surgery to remove it if it was thyroid tissue. Then at the start of this year, I had to layout my projects and goals for the year. I couldn't even give myself any due dates because all I could think of was 'but I might need surgery for my mystery tissue, then I have my 1-yr anniversary WBS in May and I'll have to go hypo....' I know, what kind of thinking was that? All I was focusing on was the what if this or what if that scenarios. Everyone around me is telling me to think positive, to not worry. That is so easy to say when you are not the one who is dealing with it. But when you are that person who is living it, it is a completely different story.
It wasn't until my appt with my 2nd opinion ENDO last month that I started to believe that things really are going to be Ok, that I don't have anything to worry about...that it is Ok to make future plans, but most importantly that it is Ok to live my life. Now, I'm not cancer free yet, and I'm not saying that I will never have anything to worry about again, because that would be foolish. But I was finally there, at the point where I wasn't worried about what was going to happen to me with my cancer.
I want to thank my family, friends, co-workers, pretty much everyone for allowing me to get to that point on my own terms. I'm sure there are some of us, cancer patient or not, that can get to that point fairly easily, but I am not one of those people. I am that person that needs to see it to believe it. But I believe it now. I am no longer letting my cancer dictate my life.
Monday, April 4, 2011
How does my neck look? 4/3/11
Saturday, after Tess worked on his nails, she called me back to sit with and talk about Frankie. She said she couldn't get him to get up. Then she started to cry and told me that this should be his last month because his mind is there, but his body cannot keep up with his brain - he wants to get up, but he doesn't know why his back legs are not working. She also said that as long as I am around to help him get up, he can keep on going forever, but I'm really just dragging things out for him. We talked about a local vet that goes to your house to put your pet down. Tess had used her before. She also mentioned another client that takes her dogs to a place for pet acupuncture. Later that evening, I got a call from Terry who told me about the Animal Healing Center.
Viv and I think we should try everything so that his last couple of weeks are good ones, no itchies, no problems getting up on his own. So while we were ready to give him meds, we are hoping that either acupuncture or chiropractic adjustment will work. It'll be more expensive than the meds route, but we want to try everything. Hopefully I can get an appt for him this week.
As for myself, I think I have been doing Ok. Dealing with work stuff. Dealing with the dog issue. I think the added T3 med has been working. Well, actually, in the last couple of weeks I have noticed the brain fog during conversations again. I really noticed it when I was in SF for my project meeting. Not the best place for this to happen. I'm supposed to have my blood drawn this week, to make sure my current meds have stabilized, and my levels are good. Not sure if my T3 or FT3 also needs to be checked. Also this week is my ThyCa meeting. I am looking forward to seeing how everyone in my group is doing, and how the newest members are dealing with things.
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